Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): To borrow the euphemistic language of the stock-market pundits, you're about to go through an "adjustment." But I wouldn't worry about it if I were you. Your recent nonstop progress has overinflated some of your opinions and judgments; a bear market will actually be a helpful tonic. However, I'm by no means urging you to lie down and take your medicine like a prune-faced adult. In fact, one of the best ways to facilitate your "adjustment" would be to head down to the nearest playground and hang upside down on the monkey bars or barrel headfirst down the slide. All you have to fear, my friend, is seriousness itself.

Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): As I meditate on your future, I keep getting a psychic impression of you playing volleyball in a swimsuit, and the volleyball bounces off your head, and you crumple to the ground and a beautiful person of your favorite gender rushes over to caress your face. Or sometimes I see a vision of you sitting on a bridge with your legs dangling over the side, and a passing bird poops on you, and you cringe and yelp and a beautiful person of your favorite gender ambles over to offer a tissue. Still other times I catch a telepathic glimpse of you wandering on a nude beach with your work clothes on, and everyone's staring at you, and you're sweating like a pig and a beautiful person of your favorite gender slides by you and barks, "Get nekkid, baby."

Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20): You know what I like most about you lately? You're like an exclusive club that anyone can join. In other words, you have high standards but you're not an elitist. Of all the people in your circle, maybe only you can create a consensus without invoking the lowest common denominator.

You may still be too impatient to begin your life's work in earnest, and too terrified of boredom to be in love with a non-neurotic person. But at least you're finally scouting out the character actors who'll help you rehearse for the big time.

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