Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): This is it. The last week before the new world begins. The final foreplay leading up to Day 1 of the Year Zero. You could compare it to the dark, pregnant hush right before snow-laden thunderclouds burst, or as the almost unbearably pleasurable buildup of erotic tension in the moments before orgasm. My advice is to imagine in lush detail what you'd like to do on the night of Dec. 31, 1999, and do it this week instead.
Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Capricorns mature quickly -- sometimes too quickly. Capricorns are the first kids on the block to expose the Santa Claus myth. They're the teen-agers with investment portfolios and the 38-year-old menopausal women. Yet there come times in every Capricorn's cycle when it's healthy to revert to earlier stages of growth. The Santa-debunker suddenly needs to sleep with his baby blanket. The adolescent entrepreneur gets hooked on Saturday-morning cartoons, and the prematurely menopausal woman finds a younger lover. Ring any bells for you? It should. The zodiacal forces are pressuring you to subtract at least five years from your age this week. Remember all the fresh and innocent stuff you knew before your oh-so-mature wisdom overwhelmed it?
Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): One of the characters on the TV science-fiction show Babylon 5 just happened, to my chagrin, to utter the very words I was planning to offer you. I hope that doesn't discredit the advice in your eyes, because it's one of the most important things I've told you in months. If you do the right thing for the wrong reasons, the work becomes corrupted. In conclusion, Aquarius, examine your motivations very thoroughly this week.
Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20): There has rarely been a more auspicious moment for you to discover the psychic judo that would allow you to transmute your paranoia into pronoia. Pronoia, as I hope you know by now, is the suspicion that the entire world is conspiring to commit wonderful and benevolent acts in your behalf. I say to you in all sincerity that I believe this to be a more apt model of how the cosmos works than the version described by paranoia. And the weird thing is, pronoia becomes objectively truer and truer the more you believe it's true.