Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): This week's new vocabulary word -- "kludge" -- comes from hacker culture. Pronounced klooj, it has at least two shades of meaning: 1) to make something work in an unorthodox way because you don't know how to do it right; 2) to adapt a piece of equipment to do something it's not supposed to do in order to get a desired task done.
Use "kludge" three times in conversation and it'll be yours forever. Better yet, put it to work as a metaphor for how to conduct yourself in the face of this week's tricky twists and turns.
Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): I suggest you start practicing. Sit in front of a mirror and see if you can feel all your deepest emotions without letting any sign of them show up on your face. Pretend you're in the midst of a high-stakes game where everything depends on your ability to stay composed and yet not be too damn serious. Do whatever it takes, in fact, to step up your mastery of the art of bluffing. Why? Because in reading your tarot cards for this week, I've discovered that you'll be called upon to access the archetype of the poker player.
Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): On rare occasions, revolutions transpire in a flash. Take the electric light bulb. Almost no one had heard of such a thing in 1878. The next year Edison patented it, and by 1882 New York City had the world's first electric power plant. I'm predicting a breakthrough of this magnitude for your personal life. You'll catch a glimpse of it this week. You'll quietly set to work on it by March 1. By April you'll see the outlines of the grand strategy. And 5 1/2 years from now you'll bring it all to a climax.
Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20): The last day of the Chinese year, which this year is Feb. 18, was traditionally a time to forgive old IOUs. I say let's revive this custom, especially for you Pisceans, who're in the final dregs of your astrological cycle. For starters, you should forgive debts owed to you (both financial and emotional). But you should also get the action going in the other direction, like by convincing others to forgive your debts to them. In fact, cut out the rest of this horoscope, photocopy it, and send copies in with your next credit card bills. Dear agency to whom this praiseworthy Pisces owes money: By all that's astrologically holy and karmically correct, I order you to totally cancel his/her debt. -- Sincerely, The Astrologer Laureate of North America.