Cothran

So the corpse made her television appearance.
(Now we all know this corpse stuff is just a joke, right? It's a rhetorical device. But, oh sweet Jesus, did you see Angela on the TV? One word: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

Anyway, the corpse left the Channel 2 studios and headed right down to City Hall, where it picked up and signed papers announcing an intention to run for mayor. While Angela was down at City Hall she nearly ran into Capt. Richard Cairns of the SFPD taking out papers of his own.

Now you gotta know what that is all about.
Cairns is buddies with evil political reanimator Jack Davis. Davis is currently, unofficially running Willie Brown's campaign. Davis, it seems, needs to get a spoiler in the race to suck votes from the candidates on Brown's right, Jordan and Reilly. So Davis gets his buddy Cairns to join the race.

And that's how we develop mayoral candidates in San Francisco, folks.
Sorry-ass media hacks prod the dead and the dumb with sticks until they react. Then sleazy political consultants manipulate the process for their own ends.

I may be overreacting here, but isn't it time to get some pitchforks and torches together and have an enraged villager party?

George Cothran (gcothran@sfweekly.com) can be reached at SF Weekly, 185 Berry, Suite 3800, San Francisco,