Killer Frog Found in GG Park
By Erin Sherbert
State Cracks Down on Ridesharing Services Again
By Rachel Swan
Poll Reveals Americans Are Completely Sick of Hipsters
Food Handler Diagnosed With Typhoid Fever
Oakland Is Officially More Exciting Than San Francisco
Assault on Devil's Slide
By Albert Samaha
Local Dudes Get Dumb On BART
Insanely Wealthy Bay Area Town Sends Obama Bill For His Visit
Yes, a new Saddam was born, most folks would say,
When his line of credit grew three sizes that day!
He gave up his terror, he hadn't the time,
With all this buying and selling -- and waiting in line!
No longer a symbol of death and destruction,
Saddam became a weapon of great mass consumption.
His hookah is Brookstone, his sword is Gillette,
His Palm Pilot's synced to his television set.
Yes, all this consumpting did open his eyes,
And thanks to McDonald's, he's become super-sized.
Now each year at Christmas, if you look really quick,
He's down at the mall dressed up as Olde Saint Nick.
Barking into his cell while collecting his loot,
Our pudgy Iraqi in a Santa Claus suit. -- Dan Siegler
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