Music

Luxxury

Trying to cash in on the electro-rock scene (way too late), unintentionally aping all those bands that popped up in 1987, trying to cash in on the new wave scene (way too late). Live-show slides of naked people don't make up for histrionic vocals, tiresome riffs, and dumb lyrics.

Out now: The Drunk EP (Nolita).

Exception to the gruel: none.

Crack: We Are Rock

Overrated quartet that occasionally writes a decent song about the sexual demimonde, but that usually equates painful synth noise and bored female singers with artistic vision.

Out now: Cosmic Mind Flight(Tigerbeat6).

Exception to the gruel: "My Dad's Boyfriend," which should (but won't) serve as the theme song for the pro-gay parenthood movement.

Ghost Orchids

Cold, twitchy, utterly derivative electronic pop music seemingly designed to inspire serious wrist-slitting or black-eyeliner applying. Most likely to make you run out and purchase the superior originals by Throbbing Gristle, Clock DVA, and the Human League.

Out now: The King Is Dead(Prince House).

Exception to the gruel: "Inside (and Out Again)," in which Bonnie Pipkin gives the proceedings some much-needed warmth.

Dynasty

This band should be a slam-dunk, combining the talents of hilarious Roofies songwriter Jibz Cameron, robo-matic Numbers drummer Indra Dunis, and the most adorable gal in S.F. rock, Diana Hayes, with production by rap-techno yowler Gold Chains. But the group's debut EP would've made a fantastic three-song single, and the best parts of its live shows are the between-song banter and the trio's nutty costumes.

Out now: Dynasty(Tigerbeat6).

Exception to the gruel: "Wargasm," a super-catchy dirge featuring the much-repeated line, "You're thinking 'bout fighting/ I'm thinking 'bout fucking/ What do you want to do?/ It's up to you to choose/ Let's choose fucking."