Dogs Die in Hot Cars

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• Brian Austin Green
• Dogs Die In Hot Cars
• Dexys Midnight Runners

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Look, everyone has influences. Dylan had Woody, Brian Austin Green had, I don't know, Hasselhoff? The trick, obviously, is to choose wisely, but if you can't do that, at least choose. Case in point: Dogs Die in Hot Cars, the Scottish quintet whose Please Describe Yourselfspotlights more new wave idols than an I Love the '80s marathon. Which is great if you do, in fact, love the '80s. For anyone else, though, by the time you've heard the Talking Heads tribute and the XTC homage and the Dexy's Midnight Runners encomium, it's tough to appreciate "I Love You 'Cause I Have To," the relentlessly catchy Madness panegyric and the only song on the album truly worth the Aqua Net flashback. Good thing, then, they put that one first, if only because that saves you 35 minutes. See, it's one thing to sing along to Pure '80s when you're drunk. It's another thing entirely to burn the disc, give it a weird new name, and tell people it's original. Because, you know, like, it's not.