The Its Just Lunch Guide to Dating in San Francisco

By Andrea McGinty, Nancy Kirsch, and Alana Beyer, et al.

10 Finger Press (2004), $9.95

If I ever catch one of my male friends reading this book, I'm going to stave in his head with a meat hammer. This "guide" was written by single women for single women. More accurately, it was written by boring, shallow, and possibly very stupid single women for their friends at cocktail hour. Readers who don't fit into this category will find little value in it.

Each of the eight chapters combines insipid relationship advice with a list of locations at which to hone one's dating skills. The writing smacks of junior-high giggles transcribed into typeface: "If you spot a hottie [in a bookstore], check out the book section he or she is browsing and ... speak up." Other stunning insights: Shower before meeting a date; smile a lot; make eye contact; be genuine; don't make fun of what the other person is wearing; don't get wasted; don't propose marriage within the first three dates. Frankly, any potential breeder who needs this kind of help should be sterilized.

With that in mind, you'll find the list of bars, restaurants, clubs, and date spots marginally useful, provided you ignore soulless suggestions like Starbucks and the Cheesecake Factory and overlook the suspicion that several entries were lifted from Zagat (which Lunch appears designed to emulate). Of course, you'll also have to confine yourself to the yuppier neighborhoods in town, which leads us to believe that the It's Just Lunch authors either a) have never been to San Francisco, b) are only interested in dating wealthy white professionals, c) are using this guide as a thinly veiled ad for their It's Just Lunch dating service, or d) should have their heads staved in with a meat hammer.