No. 1 With a Bullitt

San Francisco's murder rate is at its highest level in a decade. Whose fault is that?

6) Supervisor Daly wants to establish a body called the Homicide Prevention Council, which would include 21 members of the public and have nonvoting seats assigned to city officials. The council would be responsible for drafting a plan to curb murders in San Francisco. What do you think of this idea?

A) Well, if history has taught us anything, it's that bureaucratic citizen panels are far more effective in fighting gangs than gun-toting cops.

B) Ooh, I wanna join! I wanna join! Do we get a badge?

C) I can hear the gangsters now: "Wanna cap his ass?" "No way, man! Not unless you want the Homicide Prevention Council after us!"

7) Many police officials blame the skyrocketing unsolved murder rate on a lack of reliable witnesses in crime-heavy neighborhoods, where police are distrusted and gang reprisals are feared. How do you think the SFPD can build a better relationship with the community and solve more crimes?

A) More racist videos would probably help.

B) Get a district attorney. (Bonus point for adding: "Oops, sorry, Kamala. Didn't see you there.")

C) Hmm ... is Sam Spade doing anything these days?


How to score:

Score zero points for every "A" answer, one point for every "B," and two points for every "C."

0-6 points: We know, we know. Not only is Oakland getting cooler than San Francisco again, it's actually getting safer.

7-10 points: Yes, I'm afraid homicides in Hunters Point and the Bayview District do count as murders in San Francisco. Nice try, though.

11-14 points: Congratulations, you are a true apologist for San Francisco's murder rate. And, no, Dirty Harry doesn't work here anymore.

« Previous Page
 |
 
1
 
2
 
All
 
My Voice Nation Help
0 comments
 
©2014 SF Weekly, LP, All rights reserved.
Loading...