Tight Agenda

The latest word from the man-lube marketing grapevine: A commercial featuring a man rubbing cream on another man's hand got nothing more than "talk to the hand" from Comcast in San Francisco.

The 29-year-old creator and pretty face of Boy Butter, Eyal Feldman of Los Angeles, says that Comcast rejected an ad for his new latex-safe lube, You Won't Believe It's Not Boy Butter. According to Feldman, Time Warner Cable will begin airing the spots in select Los Angeles neighborhoods on gay and women-friendly channels like Bravo and Oxygen this week. But efforts to get Comcast to bite in San Francisco failed, and Feldman is crying anti-gay discrimination.

"I could only assume it was because two men were touching," Feldman said. "You turn on the [TV] at 10 p.m. and you're watching drunk, topless girls making out with each other on a pile of Mardi Gras beads. That they can't show this in the gay capital is a little pathetic."

A Comcast spokesman said the company's screening standards are consistent with the industry's, but didn't elaborate. When we tried to get clarification, Comcast reps declined to talk or didn't return calls.

The offending ad showcases only Feldman's and his boyfriend's hands, gesturing in front of margarine-style containers in front of a fruity phallic backdrop of bananas and cucumbers. Dubbed with innuendo-laced repartee, Feldman rubs a dab on his partner's skin and adds this final zinger while plugs for suppliers Shoplube.com and 888-4-BUTTAH scroll along the bottom of the screen: "Try squeezing a little boy butter into your tight agenda today."

Time Warner Cable rejected the commercial in New York City, a spokesman stating "It didn't meet our standards." But Feldman's agent said a small cable provider there will consider the commercial this week, after requesting that Feldman dub over the "tight agenda" bit with the more docile "Everything's a little better with Boy Butter."

Feldman urged folks to call Comcast to reverse its decision. Until then, those of us with illicit "San Francisco values" can check the commercial out on YouTube.