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Revenge of the Sequels

Hollywood serves up the same ol', same ol'

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Published on June 12, 2007 at 4:21pm

You can always count on Hollywood to fill the summer with re-heated leftovers. So pull that fork out of your eyeball (the one you stuck in there after watching last summer's sequel orgy) and dig in! Mmmmm, no nutritional value, but so comforting.

June 15FANTASTIC FOUR: RISE OF THE SILVER SURFERIn this sequel to a film every comic geek saw but few loved, a silver-skinned cool dude superhero on a surfboard joins forces with the Fab Four to once again defeat the evil Dr. Doom.

June 22EVAN ALMIGHTYMorgan Freeman returns in what's shaping up to be the first talking deity series since George Burns started yakking to John Denver. In this not-quite-a-sequel variation on the Jim Carrey hit Bruce Almighty, God comes calling on an arrogant newsman, played by Steve Carell, the new It-Man of Hollywood comedy (sorry, Jim).

June 27LIVE FREE OR DIE HARD

Twelve years and many flops after Die Hard With a Vengeance, Bruce Willis competes for box-office gold as maverick cop John McClane, who takes on a cyber terrorist (Timothy Olyphant) with the help of a computer-geek sidekick who just happens to be played by Mac ad kid Justin Long.

Aug. 3THE BOURNE ULTIMATUM

In the final film of the Bourne Trilogy, former CIA assassin Jason Bourne (Matt Damon) dodges bullets and flying cars (again) while investigating (again) the mysteries of the past he can't remember (again). Regression therapy might have been easier.

Aug. 10RUSH HOUR 3

The funny cop and the whirling dervish cop head to Paris to break up a Chinese crime gang. Quick, go rent the first two and bone up on the backstory.

Aug. 31MR. BEAN'S HOLIDAY

Mr. Bean enters a church raffle and wins a vacation to France, where he wreaks his distinct brand of havoc, including separating a father and son and getting mistaken for a kidnapper. Expect a wacky finale at a fictionalized version of the Cannes Film Festival, which is as close as films about Mr. Bean are likely to get to the real event.