How Do You Say "I Voted!" in Scottish?

What do you need to guide you safely through the terrifyingly important election tonight? For our part, we need a safe space to yell full-on obscenities at the television screen. We also need a mass of like-minded people, so we can be sure everyone's yelling at the same time. And, sadly, booze. We need booze. OK, we just want booze. At the Election Party thrown by go-go literary Scotsman Alan Black, we can find everything we need AND sign-up sheets for enlisting in the Union Army in case we need to invade the South. In case any Republicans show up, Black claims he's offering anger management classes and fliers explaining how to perform CPR so pub-goers will be ready for the “likely McCain heart attack." Hey … McCain, is that Scottish? Anyway the party also features a political open mike for rants and, you know, television, screaming, and booze.
Tue., Nov. 4, 5 p.m., 2008

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