So I ask you — and if I'd had the balls, I would've asked them — what kind of existence is that? I may not be able to afford a town in Iowa, but I can spend time with people who are important to me.

"Yep," continued the dark-haired one, "she's out there, drilling some cadaver's face, while I'm home with the kids."

I flagged down the bartender — who was actually standing right in front of me, but never noticed my attempts to make eye contact — and ordered a second beer.

Nearby, a drunken businessman was talking sports to whoever would listen. He ordered a vodka tonic and a shot of whiskey when he sat down. Dang.

"So," said the dark-haired guy, stirring his drink. "Your job as a lawyer ..."

"Yeah?" said the blond-haired guy expectantly.

"Are you... fulfilled?"

Wow. If I'd had to wager on the next thing to come out of this guy's mouth, it definitely wouldn't have been that. Apparently, the drunken businessman felt the same way. "That's like what chicks say to each other!" he let out with a guffaw, butting into their conversation. They seemed surprised that anyone had heard them.

"Yeah, guys," I said with a smile, unable to help myself. "I've been listening to your dude talk for about an hour now, and frankly I'm disappointed in you both. I thought you were men."

They laughed right back, though somewhat awkwardly; not so much because they got caught for saying anything in particular, but because they realized everyone was listening to everything they'd been saying. That has to feel funny.

But, boy howdy, was it fun for the rest of us. Suddenly I felt I had interfered too much, and that these men deserved time away from my prying ears. I also knew that once they knew I was listening, the conversation would never be the same anyway. I got up and put on my coat, stepping out into the night.

« Previous Page
 |
 
1
 
2
 
All
 
My Voice Nation Help
0 comments
Sort: Newest | Oldest
 

Concert Calendar

  • April
  • Sat
    19
  • Sun
    20
  • Mon
    21
  • Tue
    22
  • Wed
    23
  • Thu
    24
  • Fri
    25
San Francisco Event Tickets
©2014 SF Weekly, LP, All rights reserved.
Loading...