Get SF Weekly Newsletters
Pin It

Willie's Birthday Plans 

Wednesday, Mar 11 2009

Matier and Ross recently reported that former Mayor Willie Brown will celebrate his 75th birthday with a Paris blowout. How else will the city's bon vivant septuagenarian celebrate his birthday?

•Rig his 75th election

•Mention himself in the Chronicle

•Decide once and for all whether to will his fortune to his wife or mistress

•Get all excited about someone recognizing him

•Buy a new hat made from of the skin of his enemies

•Finally admit Gavin Newsom was a terrible mistake

•Bribe a respected public figure, just to prove he's still got it

•Call Jack Davis and remind him to bring the Jack Daniel's and the S&M performers to the party

•Blow out the candles and wish for a soul

•Not bother to see the doctor if his erection lasts longer than four hours

About The Author

Will Harper

About The Author

Benjamin Wachs


Subscribe to this thread:

Add a comment


  • Cirque du Soleil Returns to San Francisco
    Cirque du Soleil returns to AT&T park with their current production Kurious: Cabinet of Curiosities. Photographs by Richard Haick.
  • Slayer @ Fox Theater
    Slayer, Exodus and Suicidal Tendencies performed at the Fox Theater in Oakland on November 12, 2014. Photographs by Richard Haick.

Popular Stories

  1. Most Popular Stories
  2. Stories You Missed