Marketing Marijuana
Suggestions for brand names in S.F.
San Francisco Assemblyman Tom Ammiano recently introduced a bill that would legalize marijuana. Here are some brand names (and their slogans) we'd like to see on store shelves in S.F.:
•Marina Green — "When a cougar needs amenable prey."
•Tenderloin Bag of Shit Weed — "May contain trace amounts of marijuana."
•Lower Haight Eighth — "One gram short. Fuck the establishment!"
•Nob Hill Heirloom Herb — "For those with taste. And incurable disease."
•Pacific Heights High Price — "Crystallized by Swarovski."
•Theater District Dank — "Sleep through the show — and your life."
•South Beach Shake — "Don't be scared, yuppie! You'll barely get high."
•Rincon Hill Homegrown — "Turning vacancies into growing rooms, one foreclosure at a time."
•SOMA COMA — "Make your SRO bearable."
•Gentrified Gram — "A mix of rocks, stems, Italian shake, and Sub Zero appliances."
•Green Street Brown Bud — "For clubgoers too drunk to care. (Best seen through beer goggles.)"
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