After several months of negotiations, BART and its unions finally reached a tentative agreement last week to avoid a crippling transit strike. Here are some of the unions' demands that slowed down con-tract talks.
All trains slow down at 4:20 p.m. for ghost riding
Train operators now called train admirals
No bikes, bums, or fat chicks allowed in the first car
Muni drivers cannot make eye contact with BART operators
Overtime pay now applies to regular hours
Increase maximum speed from 50 mph to 750 mph
Doors affixed with serrated edges
Drivers allowed to sing karaoke over intercom during rush hour
15-minute breaks after every stop
Management no longer permitted in the employee nightclub in the abandoned station under Union Square
"Train arriving" announcer now Christopher Walken or William Shatner. Actually, make that a duet.