Method Man vs. Redman: tale of the tape

Is there a more beloved duo in hip-hop than Method Man and Red? Known for their sharply hilarious contributions to albums like 1999's Blackout!, they've also appeared in deodorant commercials, the stoner cult classic How High, and a short-lived Fox sitcom, Method and Red — tagline: "Puttin' the urban in suburban."

Indelible pop culture creatures, both are accomplished weed smokers, but it's their dichotomy that really makes these two so much fun. Red has the higher voice, more unkempt appearance, and reckless rapping style, while the manicured Meth possesses nearly perfect cadence. On their new collaboration, Blackout! 2, the subject matter is predictable (chicks, blunts, chicks smoking blunts), while both guys have passed their lyrical peak. But the album is nonetheless solid and funny throughout, with urgent beats from Pete Rock and Erick Sermon.

Who's the real headliner of the two? It's time to lock up your good kush and check out this tale of the tape.

Best Line on Blackout! 2

Method Man: "I can't deal with fickle minds 'cause I'm too official with mine/Put your nose in my notebook and go and sniff you a line," from "I'm Dope Nigga."

Redman: "You can smoke with the bro if you got ass and nice tits/But fuck you with that 'I'm high off of life' shit," from "Dis Iz 4 All My Smokers."

Winner: Red

Best Television Performance

Method Man: Though Meth's time on The Wire was brief, his character, Cheese, became one of the show's most memorable figures. To wit: "Omar had one of them Commando squads with him, man," Cheese told his uncle, Proposition Joe. "I mean, he had this one ho pulling guns out her pussy, unc. The shit was unseemly, man."

Redman: His episode of Cribs is without a doubt the series' highlight. Coming live from his dilapidated pad in Staten Island, the show begins with Red lying in a sleeping bag on a foldout bed. We're treated to his cramped kitchen and screenless door, Christmas presents and dirty laundry strewn about as a cousin sleeps on the floor. "This gives me a feeling that I can move up and get something way bigger than this!" Red exclaims.

Edge: Tie

Best Beef

Method Man: When erstwhile hip-hop magazine Vibe published an NCAA-style bracket to determine the best rapper, it seeded Method Man higher than N.Y.C. MC Joe Budden. Budden took to the radio to announce that he, in fact, was superior. His challenger respectfully disagreed. "He been on medication since he was in junior high school," Meth said.

Redman: Believes Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle borrowed way too liberally from How High. "They took our whole style!" he said recently, adding that film studio Universal is dragging its feet on a sequel to his stoner classic: "Universal, I need to sidekick you right in the back of your head."

Winner: Meth

Bonus Points

Method Man: Though both men like their weed, Meth appears to smoke enough to cause bodily harm to thoroughbreds. He was arrested shortly after stopping to pay a toll at the Brooklyn-Battery Tunnel in 2007. When he rolled down his window, the smell nearly did in the attendant. "It was like something out of Cheech and Chong," a witness told New York's Daily News. "He rolls down the window, and the smoke would choke a horse." (+1)

Redman: In a new Web series, Red says he wants to be a dental hygienist in the 'hood. Like, stat. "I would like to open a dental hygienist place where niggas — people — could get they teeth cleaned," he says. "Even if they don't have insurance, they could still come in. They'd still have to pay, though, but at least they'd have a clean mouth in the 'hood. I'm all about helping the 'hood out." (+2)

The winner, by split decision:

Redman

 
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