List: Muni Fight Club rules

There's been quite a lot of fighting on Muni lately. If nobody can stop it, perhaps we should govern it — with Muni Fight Club rules.

• The first rule of Muni Fight Club: You don't talk about Muni Fight Club. You should, however, upload videos to YouTube.

• If this is your first time on Muni, you have to fight.

• If a fighter says "stop" or goes limp — or his stop arrives — the fight is over.

• No shirts, no shoes. How you get on Muni like that is up to you.

• No hanging on the "Stop Requested" ropes.

• When a parent is fighting a child, the child may tap in anyone on the bus for tag-team action.

• Don't bother the driver. He's quiet like that because he's calling the bout in his head.

• No referees. Fighters must police their own actions, like gentlemanly archers.

• If it's a friendly fight among robust teens, please pass that along to the terrified old people.

• If you have multiple personalities, all personalities must fight — one another, with fists of spittle.