List: Fast Food Notion

Last week, San Francisco banned high-sugar sodas from vending machines on city property as part of a campaign against obesity. What other anti-obesity measures is the city planning to take?

• Encouraging protesters at City Hall to jog clockwise around the building instead of standing in front of it

• Establishing a Takeout Review Board to ask if you really need those egg rolls

• A new law requiring that one-third of all burritos sold be veggie

• Revising antipanhandling ordinances so that street beggars are legally allowed to ask, "Are you going to eat that?"

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• Any dessert orders must be approved by the City Operations and Neighborhood Services Committee

• Wrecking Muni service so much that people prefer to walk

• Letting the Hamburglar out of jail

• Asking bicyclists to stop being such self-righteous pricks, so that other people might consider being bicyclists, too

• Adding an exercise requirement to jury duty

• A new advertising campaign with the slogan "Food: The silent killer"

 
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