List: How the America's Cup will change our lives

Former San Francisco Mayor Willie Brown is lobbying hard to get the America's Cup to come to San Francisco. Why is it so important that S.F. host the race?

• The one thing missing from San Francisco is something to do

• Sure, our tourists are obnoxious, but they could be more obnoxious

• Local activists don't have enough to protest

• It might keep Gavin Newsom in town for a few days

• It will give white people a sense of pride in their culture and heritage

• It would mean a whole new line of tacky souvenir shirts for sale at Fisherman's Wharf

• It would create a needed "safe space" for millionaires

• It would make the race harder to ignore

• It will help teach our young people the value of tying a good knot

• Brown loves to hang out with people who own yachts

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