Unhappy Meals: How else can S.F. improve kids' health?

Last week, San Francisco forbade companies like McDonald's from including toys in children's meals that don't live up to the city's nutritional standards. What's the city's next step to promote child health?

• Banning the use of ice cream to make booboos go away

• Requiring children to meet weight loss targets before they can celebrate Christmas

• Prohibit the mixing of chocolate and peanut butter by anyone under 21

• Cutting Muni youth passes, so kids will walk more

• Working with gangs to make initiation beatings more aerobic

• Finding progressive ways to make kids feel guilty about their bodies

• Developing an informative pamphlet called Your Children, Our Choice

• Bring back child labor — so long as it's on organic farms

• Next step? What next step? This has obviously solved the problem. You're welcome, America