Diplomacy by the Bay

San Francisco Mayor Ed Lee has invited Chinese President Hu Jintao to visit San Francisco. What enticements has the mayor offered China's leader?

• Appoint anyone he wants to the Planning Commission

• Cable car all to himself

• Gets to personally enforce sit/lie law

• Gets lecture on power politics from Rose Pak

• We'll name our budget deficit after him

• Meet honest-to-God vegans

• Knows a place where you can get a medical pot certificate real easy. Just, like, say your back hurts

• He can take back as many crazy homeless people as he can catch

• Happy ending

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