Open Your Heart

This Valentine's Day weekend, we invite you to pause and look inside the heart — then death-squeeze the ventricles, hack through the mitral valve, and pierce the superior vena cava, if still attached to the meat. We're referring to the cow's organ at the Family Investigation Workshop: Heart Dissection, of course. You should attend owing to your own heart, because your kids will love you to death —not only do they get to watch a blood muscle get chopped into a meaty rose, but they also, if they're handy with a blade, get to perform the knifework itself. Primarily this is an educational dissection, concerning the affairs of the myogenic muscular fist that once circulated blood throughout an ill-fated ungulate, whereabouts now unknown though probably digested. Yet it's also a tender opportunity for you to instruct your brood that there is nothing in the heart that can kill them, so they should embrace it — their own and others', not the cow's. The cow's heart is, like, five pounds. They should go ahead and hack that thing to ribbons, especially if no paper hearts came their way on the playground.
Sat., Feb. 12, 2 p.m., 2011

 
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