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List: How the Unions Will Fix the Pension Crisis 

Wednesday, Apr 27 2011

Last week, San Francisco's labor leaders released their plan to reduce the pension costs of city workers. This is a highly controversial issue: What do the unions propose?

• That they be given time and a half for the hours spent developing this plan

• The city's pension debt must be calculated by union mathematicians

• Once their annual pensions exceed $200,000, city employees forfeit the right to be called "heroes"

• To encourage pension contributions from drivers, Muni will institute a swear jar policy

• The police union knows a guy who can cover their pension, no problem. We'll just owe him a favor, is all

• San Francisco can reduce pensions by 15 percent in exchange for the city's naming rights going to the SEIU

• Sean Elsbernd will be equipped with a magic sword and sent into the desert to find a dwarf who can spin debt into gold

• The last entry is kind of hard to read, actually ... it just sort of scrawls off into a digression about what'll happen to Jeff Adachi's family

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Benjamin Wachs


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