Nothing exercises the hammies and knees like a brisk bicycle ride. Combined with a hearty off-trail shag or blow break, that is. If the benefits of this alterna-biathlon have heretofore escaped your notice, take a gander at Bike Smut, the anything-but-coy touring program of erotic short films. A skin-baring celebration of cycling and screwing under the sun — this sixth incarnation is called “Turning Trixxx” — Bike Smut offers the wittiest and most stimulating pretense imaginable for exhibitionists, voyeurs, and porn-happy environmentalists to assemble. We can’t titillate you with titles, because the films and their makers savor a certain anonymity (except when the camera’s running), but it’s probably safe to say that no customer will leave, ahem, unsatisfied. The lineup includes a half-dozen films from Europe, where this cinematic subgenre of amateur calisthenics apparently originated, along with a pair of shorts by established Bay Area sexploitation queens. Count on a variety of illustrated suggestions for what to do with a bicycle built for two, none of which Harry Dacre had in mind when he composed “Daisy Bell” in 1892, or when Hal (unplugged) sang it in 2001: A Space Odyssey.
Tue., Feb. 5, 8 p.m., 2013