The Snatch: Past Tense of "Snitch"

The Snatch

The Cost of Doing No Business

A labor fight is like a divorce: Your dirty laundry and finances are aired in public, after which you end up with less than you had hoped. BART and its two biggest unions are in it for the long haul, and must make nice after what's been, according to one of the negotiators at the table, "the most acrimonious" labor dispute in recent memory. It's also not free. While it's about 0.001 percent of its annual budget, since March, the transit agency has spent $15,000 a month on public-relations specialists hired specifically for its labor dispute. We'll remember that next time BART tries to get us to pony up more money for fares.

But What About Our Freedoms?

You know who else is tired of your double-parking ass? Supervisor Scott Wiener. The man who banned naked penises is now turning his efforts toward irreverent drivers who think they can park any damn place they please. And there's a reason drivers think that — because they kinda can. As Wiener notes, the city has been a little too hands-off when it comes to double-parking. But that's about to come to an end. Wiener is calling for a hearing to discuss the problem. Better carpool to this one.

Make the Russian Bear Dance!

A local porn store decided to get involved in international politics by asking patrons to help it supply Russian President Vladimir Putin with his very own supply of dildos. According to, a San Francisco-based online porn shop, the perfect dildo just might help "loosen up" the very rigid leader, who recently signed a law making it illegal for gay couples in Russia to adopt children. The retailer says it will deduct $5 from your next dildo purchase if you send that pleasure piece to Putin. VP Jeff Dillon says, "We also hope he puts the dildos to good use for himself because as we have seen with many public figures, 'those that shout the loudest...'"

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