The Snatch: The Snack Pack of News

The Bridge is Out, Then In

The great news is that the new Bay Bridge will open on time. The bad news is that the Bay Bridge will be closed for five days over Labor Day weekend while crews finish the new span, including paving and striping. BART says in lieu of bridge service (which will be closed Aug. 28-Sept. 3), it will operate its trains around the clock between Aug. 28 and Sept. 2. Aren't you really glad BART isn't on strike?

Vote Soon and Often

Nothing screams "We are America" more than strip malls, all-you-can-eat buffets, and that annual trip to Cancun. In an effort to prove America isn't totally vacuous, USA Today has drummed up a contest where readers like yourself can vote on the nation's most kick-ass U.S. landmark. Naturally, being one of the more comely cities in America, San Francisco has not one, but two landmarks nominated: The historic Cable Cars and the Golden Gate Bridge. Not nominated: Gay bathhouses, any pop-ups or poutineries, The Wiggle.

Science Connects the Steering Wheel to the Asshole

The BMW comes with just about everything one needs for a luxurious ride around town. Except of course, well-mannered drivers. The hypothesis — largely based on sideswipes and lack of pedestrian-friendly behavior — that BMW drivers are jerks has now been backed up by science. Two studies, one in the U.S. and one in the U.K., give statistical evidence that BMW drivers lack goodwill on the road. Subsequent studies will attempt to find a correlation between car color and penis size.

Log on and Repent

Last week the San Francisco Jewish nonprofit G-dcast unveiled a new app to allow devotees to unburden themselves of sin with help from an animated goat. The so-called "Atonement App" submits individual confessions to an @SinfulGoat Twitter feed, where they're posted anonymously. "There's a story in the Old Testament about how people use a goat to atone for their sins," says spokeswoman Edit Ruano, adding that the app essentially uses new technology to teach old religion. It'll be way more popular than iCrucify.

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