The Snatch: Discovering New Meanings for "Heavy Petting"

Commuters Strike Back

There's little BART commuters could do about this transit tragedy other than hop a ferry or just say "screw it" and stay home making conference calls in their PJs. Oh wait, there is one thing you can do while waiting in that long line to catch the ferry: sign a petition banning all future BART strikes. Orinda City Councilmember Steve Glazer, who also happens to be running for state assembly, launched his presumably soon-to-be popular petition through Go Petition, an online platform with an ambitious motto of "changing the world." All he needs now is your for you to take all your anger and unleash it. According to Glazer, "New York, Chicago, Massachusetts, Washington, and San Francisco restrict transit strikes. Due to the crippling impact a BART strike would have on the Bay Area and California economy, it is imperative that the State Legislature provide a backstop to the regional BART Board through a ban on BART strikes." So there you have it: your very own chance to screw BART unions right back.

Pet Condoms for Sex-Addicted Dogs

We got your attention, didn't we? That's exactly what the SPCA had been hoping for when it started advertising pet condoms on its website. Appropriately dubbed "Animal Instinct," the new pet condom is about as real as that dog who drove through the streets of San Francisco. But the campaign is for real. In its latest effort to call attention to the need for pet owners to spay and neuter their horny dogs and cats, the SPCA launched a new website which advertises pet condoms, encouraging owners to "put it on before they get it on." But once you click on the many services the new site offers, including advice on how to deal with a cat who is on the prowl, the joke is up, and a pop-up is displayed that reads: "C'mon. There's only one real fix. Spay or Neuter Your Pet. Make An Appointment Now (415) 554-3030." We're still awaiting comment from the Catholic Church.

My Voice Nation Help
©2014 SF Weekly, LP, All rights reserved.