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2006 Stories by Katy St. Clair

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  • Sleuthing the View from the top

    published December 20, 2006

    A friend of mine recently told me that he has taken to reading to his wife before bedtime. Lately he's been thinking of diving into the Sherlock... More >>

  • Morality plays in an age of Bacchus

    published December 13, 2006

    TONIGHT, Wednesday, Dec. 13, come to Elixir in the Mission at 9 p.m. The Bouncer will be bartending! All tips go to charity. Morality optional. More >>

  • 'Round the clock hipsters are so passť

    published November 29, 2006

    Last week I had to sit through Happy Feet. Thems the breaks when you work with retarded people. Anywho, as I was suffering through another... More >>

  • The Lion, the fruit, and wizzbangs

    published November 22, 2006

    Meet the Bouncer! Katy St. Clair will be guest bartending at Elixir in the Mission on Wednesday, Dec. 13th. Come on out and say hello! Everyone is... More >>

  • Working out the balance of the universe in North Beach

    published November 15, 2006

    Things fall apart. Yet despite the dips and valleys in life, in the end, I believe that the universe evens itself out. I suppose this is the sort... More >>

  • The sanctity of Strip-Mall Bars

    published October 25, 2006

    You have to be careful in San Francisco when someone describes a place as a "hole in the wall." Once you've made sure that they weren't speaking... More >>

  • All-American pride at the student union Pub

    published October 11, 2006

    I just spent two weeks with my tiny 86-year-old Dutch great aunt in Pasadena. "Omi," Dutch for grandma, is all-American, except for her heavy... More >>

  • Slide with a side of attitude

    published September 20, 2006

    According to folks in the know, a new San Francisco club called Slide was opening last week and it was simply the place to see and be seen.... More >>

  • Guinea pigs are the new buffalo wings

    published September 13, 2006

    There are currently eight guinea pigs living in my house, the piercing squeaks from which would give even Krzysztof Penderecki pause. They... More >>

  • Slamming poetry and dumb white dudes

    published September 6, 2006

    Dude, I picked the wrong night to look like Debi Mazar. I had my hair pulled back into a tight ponytail and was wearing big hoop earrings, a... More >>

  • Touch me, I'm sick

    published August 30, 2006

    Josephine Tey was a mystery writer best known for her book The Daughter of Time, in which the protagonist detective does all of his... More >>

  • Strokes hair and suburban boozing

    published August 23, 2006

    Hodgepodge. You gotta like the word hodgepodge. Not only is it somewhat onomatopoeic, but it reminds me of Fred Sanford if he were a... More >>

  • Cliff House

    published August 9, 2006

    I lost an autistic person in the woods this week. We were hiking in Marin, which is one of the cool things I get to do at my job, which is working... More >>

  • Part II of Radio Bar

    published August 2, 2006

    When last we spoke, I had posited the question as to whether or not a perfect evening out had to meet the same criteria as a good work of fiction.... More >>

  • The seven dependable plots of highly successful barflies

    published July 26, 2006

    Common wisdom holds that in fiction there are only seven basic plots that recur repeatedly. These story archetypes are all pretty much the same,... More >>

  • Watching World Cup at Pompei's Grotto

    published July 19, 2006

    Here is the center of my universe these days, the thing that makes me tick and tock, my motivation for getting out of bed in the morning: I am... More >>

  • War of the words

    published July 5, 2006

    In everyone's life a little Floyd must amble. Floyd is my friend. He is stout with a baby face and a trilly laugh, not unlike a schoolgirl's.... More >>

  • Two bitches and a beer

    published June 28, 2006

    The deal with the Romantic poets (other than a fashion sense centered around tight velvet trousers) was the idea that art should rush from one's... More >>

  • Home on the range in the land of philodendron

    published June 21, 2006

    I am originally from East Central Illinois. Granted, I grew up in a university town, so we ain't talking Skoal Hollow, Mississip', or nothing, but... More >>

  • Drinking pints with flying saucers

    published June 14, 2006

    Fred had always been a little bit strange, but after he visited the crop circle he got downright weird. "I didn't know it at the time," he said as... More >>

  • My So-Called Night

    published June 7, 2006

    "All the world's a stage and all the men and women merely players," said one wise sage. I believe it was one of those "Will" guys who first... More >>

  • Terrorists have won the war on booze

    published May 31, 2006

    Is there anything more morose than a parking garage? Is it not a sad, somber structure that spirals down down down amid far-off screeches... More >>

  • Getting misty for the cranky old barkeep

    published May 24, 2006

    When last we spoke, I no doubt left you on the edge of your seat wondering whether or not I made it home in my unregistered car before the fuzz... More >>

  • The black and white came and crushed my groove (again)

    published May 10, 2006

    Let's talk about one of the Seven Deadly Sins: envy. There are a lot of people who I envy, not so much for who they are but for what they have.... More >>

  • Keep your bumper stickers off my lifestyle

    published April 26, 2006

    I have some great ideas for bumper stickers. First, there is my George Bush-themed line. Picture if you will the familiar "W" sticker on the backs... More >>

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