rss Email Author Rob Brezsny

1995 Stories by Rob Brezsny

Archives: 1999 | 1998 | 1997 | 1996 | 1995
  • REAL ASTROLOGY For an Unreal World

    published December 27, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): Travis Bixby, a Northern California man born under the sign of the ram, has demonstrated once again why you Aries are... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY For an Unreal World

    published December 20, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): I want to express my admiration for the adventures you've risked in 1995. You've had a sixth sense about when it's best... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY For an Unreal World

    published December 13, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): Check to see how many of the following symptoms you're suffering from: 1) decreased attention span; 2) impaired ability... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY For an Unreal World

    published December 6, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): I hope you heeded my alarm last week. I hope that by now you're headed out toward the frontier, even if that means you... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY For an Unreal World

    published November 29, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): One Aries I know hasn't come out of her house in three days. She just sits there poring over old National Geographics.... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY For an Unreal World

    published November 22, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): I call the ninth house your House of Frontier Adventures. These days it happens to be jampacked with planets. The last... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY For an Unreal World

    published November 15, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): Your lucky colors of the week: pomegranate and beet. Favorable numbers: 15, 51, 115, 151, 155, 511, 515, 551. Best... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY For an Unreal World

    published November 8, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): The definition of magic, according to Brezsny's Unabridged Dictionary, is as follows: creating changes to accomplish... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY For an Unreal World

    published November 1, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): Although the chances that you'll receive a six-figure inheritance this week are higher than usual, they're still only a... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY For an Unreal World

    published October 25, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): This is the astrological season when you're most likely to be hypocritical. I'm not saying you will be. I'm simply... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY For an Unreal World

    published October 18, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): I predicted the mainstream media wouldn't spend a dime investigating the militia movement until a spectacle bigger than... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY For an Unreal World

    published October 11, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): Any psychologist will tell you how common it is for a time of intense intimacy between two people to be followed by a... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY For an Unreal World

    published October 4, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): Aries of the Week is Grandma Betty, a 66-year-old fireball from Philadelphia. Betty retired from her job at the phone... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY For an Unreal World

    published September 27, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): Pop quiz! How are the four following events related? Sept. 29, 1513: Balboa discovers the Pacific Ocean. Sept. 29,... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY For an Unreal World

    published September 20, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): The equinox arrives Sept. 23. For a brief cosmic moment, the sun hovers directly over the equator; the length of day... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY For an Unreal World

    published September 13, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): Recently I've received inquiries from an Aries who wants to know if I'd accept bribes in return for a series of... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY For an Unreal World

    published September 6, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): Maharishi Mahesh Yogi brags that when his teams of meditators set up shop in any given town, they can lower the crime... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY For an Unreal World

    published August 30, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): Picture yourself in this scene: a Jacuzzi suite with a stunning view, an expert massage artist of your favorite gender,... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY For an Unreal World

    published August 23, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): This is my macho challenge to you Aries women: I dare you to get as pushy and wild-eyed as you need to be in order to... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY For an Unreal World

    published August 16, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): I'm coming to you today from a garage sale in Columbus, Neb., where I've just bought, for 10 cents, a stained astrology... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY For An Unreal World

    published August 9, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): Some cynical wag whose name I won't dignify by mentioning once said that people always want what they don't have and... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY for an unreal world

    published August 2, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): Was last week as good for you as it was for me? From the crazed glint in your eye, I'd say the earth moved the... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY for an unreal world

    published July 26, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): Because of your extraordinary talent for pleasure, you've been hand-picked by the Committee on Cross-Cultural Ecstasy... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY for an unreal world

    published July 19, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): This might sound weird, but in the yearly cycle of the typical Aries, something resembling hibernation tries hard to... More >>

  • REAL ASTROLOGY for an unreal world

    published July 12, 1995

    Aries (March 21-April 19): I'm about to take my first vacation in two years and have decided not to leave my home empty while I'm gone. At first... More >>

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