This Is Why Everyone Hates Us, San Francisco!

via imgur/Smug Francsico

Guys. C'mon. We've already got a reputation for being the smuggiest, nanny-state, naked wackadoos in These United States — do we really need to provoke more ire by waving our superior weather patterns in the faces of the victims of Snowmagedden 2011? I'm not going to pretend I wasn't one of the people taking up too much room in the park and slurping down whimsically flavored ice cream, but having passed a few winters in Ohio sleeping, crying, and drinking moderately priced vodka, I must argue the case for empathy.

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