Going Illegit: How to Be an Outlaw Food Cart

Open flames = good.

On Thursday, SFoodie's Jonathan Kauffman will finish “Going Legit,” an excellent sixpart series providing valuable tips on how to navigate the tricky world of legal street food businesses. The articles should save prospective vendors lots of bureaucratic nightmares, and probably a decent chunk of change as well. But we also understand that the system is still so daunting and tricky that many people will continue to consider operating outside of it.

Well, if you're gonna do that, do it with some style and panache — be an outlaw! Simply follow our top tips on going illegitimate:

• Don't feed them before midnight: Health inspectors like to sleep, so make sure you're out on the streets selling after they're all unconscious. Keep a small cache of Rohypnol (aka roofies) in case one happens to turn up at an odd hour; you can grind one up and slip it in his taco.

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