Where: Top of the Mark
When: Friday and Saturday, Dec. 9 and 10; Friday and Saturday, Dec. 16 and 17, 12:30 to 2 p.m.
The rundown: Want to take your kids to something they totally won't appreciate and spend tons of money while doing it? Good news! Top of the Mark's Magical Holiday Tea is here. They advertise "an amusing family-friendly event welcome to all ages, featuring magician, RJ Owens, and face painter, Sandra Lethley." Ye gods. This is something only your out-of-touch octogenarian great-grandmother, or Meryl Streep's character in The Devil Wears Prada, think is a good idea for kids. Am I wrong? Someone tell me I'm wrong. Tell me I'm wrong that it's perfectly okay to spend almost 50 bucks on a mac & cheese buffet for a four-year-old in a place that nobody under the age of 45 should ever even step foot in.
But maybe I'm wrong.
One nice thing: They're inviting guests to bring a new toy to donate to the U.S. Marines Toys for Tots Drive. Each guest that brings in a toy will receive a $2 discount on the price of tea service. TWO DOLLARS. Go for it, I'm sure the kids will appreciate the view and the white tablecloths and the scones. Actually, upon second thought, I'm gonna set up a mac & cheese buffet in my living room and charge only $40! The entertainment will be me vacuuming, and each kid will leave with their very own handful of my sheepdog's hair. I mean, as long as we've all gone crazy.
For more information on Top of the Mark and to make reservations, visit their website or call 616-6916.