National League (Baseball)

How to get spanked by men in pinstripes

Did You Vote for Barry Bonds 37 Times Today?

Less than Zito -- a Giants disaster in motion

Kim Jong-Il, Jesus, Watson and Crick, SF Rabbi Langer: the Snitch presents the "Top Ten Most Jaw-Dropping Bobbleheads"

Bay Area Jobs Outlook - Winners, Losers, and Boomers

Blue in the Bay: Pre-Season Warmup

Blue in the Bay: Dodgers Edge Giants in Season Opening Series

San Francisco And The Culture Of Waiting

Hey DJ! Friday Q&A: Mr. E

One of the most respected DJs to grace the Bay Area, Miguel Escobedo has been manning the decks for over two decades. The resident DJ for San Francisco's Rock the Bells tour stop, he's one of the most sought out vinyl spinners when national artists are looking for local support. Coming up in the g ... More >>

San Francisco Giants Make Their Sales Pitch -- And It's Zito-Esque

As baseball fans, I think we can all agree that Tim Lincecum is spectacular. Even homeless men told me last year that the Giants were too painful to follow -- this coming from men who have slept on pavement for 30 years -- but they still peered through the fence when the Cy Young Award winner pitche ... More >>

Giants Try Their Sales Pitch Again -- and Whiff

A short while ago, a well-meaning sales rep from the San Francisco Giants called and wanted to make a deal. He knew I loved spur-of-the-moment decisions to get cheap tickets to go see the team's sensational young pitcher, Tim Lincecum. So, how about this offer: Four-packs (kills the spur-of-the-mome ... More >>

Jeff 'French Vanilla' Kent Won't Be Missed in San Francisco -- But He Was a Great Giant

After second baseman Jeff Kent left the San Francisco Giants in 2002, he deeply offended the city by questioning our fashion sense (he chided the home team's "French vanilla" uniforms). Then, last year, he donated $15,000 to the Prop. 8 campaign -- proving that, yes, you can be a fashion critic and ... More >>

San Francisco's Bitterness Toward Our Glamorous SoCal Neighbors Shows Through in the Stands

If the media hyperventilates when this guy shows up at a ballgame -- your city might have an inferiority complexWhen a spokeswoman for San Jose's mayor last week told SF Weekly that Gavin Newsom didn't belong on a Washington, D.C. junket along with the boss men of San Jose, Los Angeles, and San Dieg ... More >>

Will Rec & Park Department Beware the Brides of March?

Felipe BuitragoBlushing bridesNewcomers to San Francisco quickly learn that pulling dubious stunts in public is about as essential a part of this city's character as Dungeness crab, Giants games, or self-entitled, ultra-liberal smugness. Whether it's tomato fights, pie-throwing, zombie proms, or no- ... More >>

You Don't Have to Be a Psychologist to Figure Out the Deeper Meanings of Giants' TV Ads

Let's be honest, the Giants could use this guy, too. The San Francisco Giants' entire ad campaign used to boil down to "Come watch: We Got Barry." Now the overriding message is, "Come watch: Barry's gone." A quartet of new Giants ads have been playing on San Francisco screens, and the theme coul ... More >>

Oakland A's Owner Announces Desire for Team to Play In San Jose -- But Can't Be Bothered to Go There

It's home "crowds" like these, in a stadium with all the charm of botulism that spurred Oakland A's owner Lew Wolff to seek greener pasturesDo you know the way to San Jose? It's a good bet that more Americans know that snippet of the old song (written by Burt Bacharach and Hal David for Dionne Warwi ... More >>

AT&T Park Bustling Early on Opening Day

Peter JamisonParking Lot of DreamsThe above photo was snapped at 8:18 a.m. this morning -- the San Francisco Giants' opening day. As you can see, the parking lots behind AT&T Park were filling up early. While the workaday world was still reading the newspaper (!) over its cereal or crowding int ... More >>

Chronicle Reports Giants Offering No-Interest Loan to Ticket-Buyers -- Which Comes as Surprise to Giants

You can get a lot at a Giants game -- but not free money. Sorry. Despite what you may have read elsewhere, the San Francisco Giants wish for you to buy your peanuts and crackerjack, like the song says -- they won't loan them to you. They won't loan you cash either. In an opening day story in the San ... More >>

SF Weekly Letters

You can get a lot at a Giants game -- but not free money. Sorry. Despite what you may have read elsewhere, the San Francisco Giants wish for you to buy your peanuts and crackerjack, like the song says -- they won't loan them to you. They won't loan you cash either. In an opening day story in the San ... More >>

Music for Swingers

The Giants' theme songs get us thinking outside the batter's box.

Let the Sun Shine, You Hypocrites

Journalism is under attack from lefties who promote public access to information.

Attention SF Giants, DiFi - Matt Smith's New Year's Resolutions Others Ought to Follow

DiFi's husband and the Giants' owner should resolve to do better in the coming year

Dancing on the Culture Bus' ashes

DiFi's husband and the Giants' owner should resolve to do better in the coming year

End of an Era

As The Apologist takes a bow and asks its final questions, it's time to turn the spotlight on ourselves

Letters to the Editor

Week of 1-24-2007

Deal or No Deal

Giants GM Brian Sabean spent big money on the free-agent market. What do you think of his wheeling and dealing?

A Very Good Year

We look back on the big news stories of 2006 and ask the tough question: Are you an apologist for the year that was?

Rotting on the Dock of the Bay

The easy choice between a destitute Port Authority and acres of rotting piers, or a beautified waterfront with some hotel rooms

If You're Goin' to San Francisco ...

If Haight Street is wall-to-wall people, it must be tourist season. How do you really feel about all those outsiders who swell the city's population?

Most Valuable Teammate

What team more than the Giants needs a morale booster and respectful team player? They got one in Mark Sweeney.

I'd Like to Buy the World a Hyphy

What team more than the Giants needs a morale booster and respectful team player? They got one in Mark Sweeney.

Change Your Romance Regime

A monthly guide: 12 new ways to meet "The One" in the new year

Giants Fans Aren't Panicking, But Slashed Ticket Prices Indicate Team Brass May Be

The San Francisco Giants are a hell of a team. Only a few games into the nascent season and they've already got me feeling like a naive jackass for writing that "Hope Springs Eternal on Opening Day." Perhaps, with this team, hope really is a dangerous thing. Hope can drive a man insane. And yet, the ... More >>

Rock the Bells Announces Bay Area Dates

Rock the Bells 2007, San Francisco America's premier (and possibly only major) hip-hop touring festival, Rock the Bells, has announced the date and venue for the 2009 edition: August 9, at the Shoreline Auditorium in Mountain View. While ASD much prefers the parking lot of the stadium where the Gia ... More >>

Baseball Savant Pablo Sandoval Is Must-See TV -- And That's What Giants Need

Just prior to the season, we chatted with the impresario behind the Giants' latest round of TV ads. As we put it then, "The San Francisco Giants' entire ad campaign used to boil down to 'Come watch: We Got Barry.' Now the overriding message is, 'Come watch: Barry's gone.'" Needless to say, it hasn't ... More >>

Barry Bonds Steroids Satire Prompts Acclaim, Criticism of Elk Semen Drinking

Just prior to the season, we chatted with the impresario behind the Giants' latest round of TV ads. As we put it then, "The San Francisco Giants' entire ad campaign used to boil down to 'Come watch: We Got Barry.' Now the overriding message is, 'Come watch: Barry's gone.'" Needless to say, it hasn't ... More >>

Will Ghost of Atlee Hammaker (Who Isn't Dead Yet) Haunt Tim Lincecum?

Redrum...redrum...redrum...As we wrote on opening day, San Francisco Giants fans have been all too well trained to listen for that other shoe to drop. A team that has never brought a championship trophy back to this city has subtly taught us that every joyous moment will be eventually ameliorated by ... More >>

When it Comes to Trade Deadline Sluggers, Ryan Garko Is About as Big as the Giants Go

Ryan Garko is not supernatural -- but, then, who is?​Moments after the San Francisco Giants obtained first baseman Ryan Garko in exchange for a Single-A pitcher 99 percent of the team's fans had never heard of, the Internet critiques came in two flavors: No. 1 -- Ryan Garko ain't all that. No. 2 - ... More >>

Progress: Internet News Delivery Accelerates -- From Speed of Snail to Speed of Sanchez

News travels fast ... as fast as Freddy​The other day, we wrote about how our "Google alert" shot us an article reporting that San Francisco had adopted mandatory composting -- a mere five weeks after it happened. Considering the article ran in a Chico paper, and tabulating that the information ha ... More >>

It's Time For the Giants to Get Busy Living or Get Busy Dying

Giants fans agree with Red all too well: 'Hope is a dangerous thing. Hope can drive a man insane.'​When you root for the San Francisco Giants you get the calls and you make the calls. After Game 6 in 2002, I called my longtime best friend -- who followed me into rooting for San Francisco even thou ... More >>

Baseball's Bizarre Cost-Benefit Economics Means Brad Penny Signing Has Already Paid Off For Giants

Keith AllisonBoston castoff Brad Penny has already earned his keep with the Giants​Raise your right hand high over your head if you predicted that the San Francisco Giants' scrap-heap recovery project, Brad Penny, would come within three outs of throwing a shutout last night in a dominant debut vs ... More >>

Denver Bastards Strike Back!

​Earlier today, we responded to a sudden and deliberate attack from the Colorado Rockies jockstrap-sniffers at our sister paper, the Denver Westword. While we acknowledge that our hometown San Francisco Giants are facing an uphill battle to make the postseason, we contend that the team's competiti ... More >>

Philadelphia Phillies Do Giants Fans a Favor. When Will Giants Do the Same?

​The other day, your humble narrator had a sporting experience that flummoxed him. After Bay Area local Jimmy Rollins doubled home the tying and winning runs for the Philadelphia Phillies over the Los Angeles Dodgers with two outs in the ninth, a clatch of L.A. fans in the corner actually booed an ... More >>

Once a joke, SFPD is actually solving murders these days

​The other day, your humble narrator had a sporting experience that flummoxed him. After Bay Area local Jimmy Rollins doubled home the tying and winning runs for the Philadelphia Phillies over the Los Angeles Dodgers with two outs in the ninth, a clatch of L.A. fans in the corner actually booed an ... More >>

S.F. Babylon: A Decade of Hypocrisy, Scandal, and Weirdness Pt. 2

Over the past decade, we have often felt as though we might be living in an adult playground run by a feisty bunch of hypocrites, philanderers, and drunk-dialers. This, we have to admit, makes San Francisco a pretty exciting city in which to gather the news. Narrowing down the top 10 (okay, it's rea ... More >>

It's Your Friday Morning News Quiz -- Now With a Prize!

Most literate indeed​Littering! Loitering! Literacy! It was the week it was and this is the quiz it is. And, this week, we're not giving you the answers at the end (yet). The first person to send us a perfect score here wins a prize! That's right, you can possess the massive white tiger stuffed an ... More >>

Side Effects of Marijuana: Does Pot Mean No Payday for Tim Lincecum?

The fact the San Francisco Giants' Tim Lincecum was charged with misdemeanor marijuana possession following a traffic stop near his Washington State hometown barely raised eyebrows among local Giants faithful.  Come on -- a 25-year old West Coast kid, a snowboarder, with that long hair? Dude lo ... More >>

Panda Express: Crashing Pablo Sandoval's Entertaining Gig on Giants TV Show

Joe EskenaziGiants slugger Pablo Sandoval and his new mohawk 'do​After taking in yesterday's taping of Inside the Clubhouse -- which really is taped in the San Francisco Giants' clubhouse -- I'm left with two sparkling memories: Team hitting coach Hensley "Bam Bam" Meulens pointing at outfielder N ... More >>

Giants' 'Dynamic' Pricing System Is Downright Evil

The Giants may not be able to afford Barry Zito, but Giants fans on a budget can now only afford to go to his games​Let me say it up front and outright: The San Francisco Giants' long-planned move to charge more for more desirable games makes good business sense. Including factors such as the day' ... More >>

The Case For Barry Zito

Barry Zito is a lot better than you think. Of course, that statement is relative. ​My old pal Randy Shaw at BeyondChron and your humble narrator will never be confused for blood brothers -- but we are both U.C. Berkeley alums and longtime San Francisco Giants supporters who have suffered mightily ... More >>