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Chron's anniversary surprises 

Wednesday, Jan 28 2009

The San Francisco Chronicle is celebrating its 144th year, and says it will have 144 "surprises" for readers. What will some of them be? Here are our predictions.

• 144 layoffs

• C.W. Nevius is irradiated at a planning committee meeting, gets super powers

• The Sporting Green returns, but this time is made from hemp

• Repurchase the Examiner and name it the Chronicle again for old time's sake

• Give editor-at-large Phil Bronstein a new, even less meaningful title

• Fact checking

• Home delivery now done by strippers

• Conservative columnist Debra Saunders finally admits to having a crush on Obama

• Take away Mark Morford's drugs, see what happens

• Publisher adopts a streetwise Asian kid and together they solve mysteries

• Chip Johnson writes about something other than Ron Dellums

• Newsstand at Powell station to get open bar

• Willie Brown to write about someone other than himself

• Matier and Ross finally get married — to each other

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