Coochie-Coochie Her acting talents have been showcased in theaters and on The Love Boat. Guitar Player magazine voted her "The Best Flamenco Guitarist in the World." She sings, she dances, and -- according to Daily Variety -- she "works like a trouper every minute she's on stage." She's the one and only Charo, ageless as ever and still a "succex," and she's taking a break from neon Vegas to spread a little sunshine in the less glittery Bay Area. See this total role model sing, strum, and coochie-coochie at 7 and 10 p.m. at Coconut Grove, 1415 Van Ness, S.F. Tickets are $45; call 776-1616.
Mississippi Blues "Scenes that I thought had long vanished from the American land were revealed. ... Few outsiders would believe what I have seen if not for my camera." So writes Ken Light in the introduction to his new book, Delta Time. A product of four-and-a-half years spent traveling the Mississippi Delta, Light's newest photographs show that the civil rights movement scarcely reached field workers in the area. Whether documenting tumbledown homes and churches or paying tribute to religious rituals and celebrations, Light updates the social-documentary style of Depression-era photographers like Dorothea Lange. See his work Tuesday through Saturday from 10 a.m. to 7 p.m. at Vision North Gallery, 2300 Polk, S.F. The show runs through Sept. 9. Free; call 474-4581.
Dancing Queen Born in France, raised in Spain, La Tania learned to flamenco dance practically before she crawled out of the crib; studying under Paco Pea and Maria Maya, she's toured the world for 25 years, establishing herself as one of today's premier young flamenco artists. Dramatic and declarative, a mix of improvisation, interpretation, and innovation, La Tania's performances usually involve an international troupe of artists. Dancers Virginia Iglesias and Fibi Vernier, singers Antonio de Jerez and Robert Zamora, and guitarists Don Fontowitz and Guillermo Rios join her for two world premieres and an assortment of traditional dances at 8 p.m. at Laney College Theater, 900 Fallon, Oakland; the show continues through July 30. Tickets are $5-18; call (510) 889-9550.
Attack of the Red Hot Skillet Lickers Q: What gets bigger and bigger as it gets older? A: The Jazz & Wine at Embarcadero Center festival, amongst other things. Last year's event drew 20,000 people -- this year's features more performers (16) and more wineries (30), so more listeners and drinkers are likely to attend. The Josh Jones Quintet, Conjunto Cespedes, Lavay Smith and Her Red Hot Skillet Lickers, David Hardiman's S.F. All-Star Big Band, and acid-jazz Trekkies T.J. Kirk (whose Warner Bros. debut just hit the stores) kick off a three-day celebration that also features gallery exhibits (including one devoted to Duke Ellington) and food from nearby restaurants; the sounds and sipping start at 5:30 p.m. at 2, 3, and 4 Embarcadero Center, S.F. Free; call (800) 733-6318.
(Don't) Stand-Up You could see it as an alternative to the stand-up comedy-club scene. You could see it as a home for laugh merchants who've done their time and then escaped from that sinking, stinking ship known as Saturday Night Live. Regardless, the people behind "Un-Cabaret" want you to see it. Born at Los Angeles' Luna Park, the revue has grown up enough to take to the road, with a cast that includes Terry Sweeney (best-known for his Nancy Reagan spoofery on SNL), Julia Sweeney (whose nearly straight-to-video It's Pat! film is actually a weird gem, complete with cameos by Camille Paglia and Ween), Taylor Negron, and others. The chuckles commence at 8 p.m. at the Great American Music Hall, 859 O'Farrell, S.F. Tickets are $15; call 885-0750.
Mighty Morphin Petting Anchors Power Rangers, petting zoos, and TV news anchors are just some of the attractions at this year's KTVU/Fox Family Kids Fair. Fifty activity centers will house over 110 hands-on activities, and Angel Grove's Mighty Morphin Power Rangers will take a brief break from school and crime-fighting to visit San Jose. Kids can enjoy entertainment from clowns, magicians, storytellers, comedians, gymnasts, and dance troupes; adults can marvel at the great hairdos of Elaine Corral and Leslie Griffith, who -- in terms of style and smarts -- put the Bay Area's other newscasters to shame. The mania spans from 10 a.m. to 9 p.m. (and continues July 30) at San Jose Convention Center, 150 West San Carlos, San Jose. Admission is free-$5; call (510) 874-0422.
Oxymoronic Antics The seven members of True Fiction Magazine have been performing together for six years: Collectively, they've clocked 137 years of improvisation experience. Can one's spontaneity improve over time? Find out for yourself when the TFM ensemble performs A Spontaneous Spectacle, its largest show to date. Guest musicians (led by TFM regular J. Raoult Brody) and movable set pieces (for instant scene changes) will be on hand for maximum silliness. The curtain rises at 8 p.m. at Cowell Theater, Fort Mason, S.F. Tickets are $13-15; call 824-1559.
Trashy Aesthetics Indoor shows tend to get more media attention (and money), but many contemporary urban artists reject the gallery sphere, creating public works that respond to industrial waste and reclaim inner-city environments. Sponsored by Headlands Center for the Arts, "Nurturing Nature: Reclaiming the Landscape" features presentations by five such creators/activists: environmental historian/geographer Gray Brechin; multidisciplinary artist Mel Chin; landscape architect George Har-greaves; sculptor Susan Leibovitz Steinman; and Jacquiline Tripp, artist-in-residence manager at NORCAL. The showing and telling runs from 10 a.m. to noon at M.H. de Young Memorial Museum, Golden Gate Park, S.F. Tickets are $5-6; call 750-3624.
Heavenly Voices Matrise des Hauts-de-Seine (the Paris Opera Boys Choir) is on a national tour; sponsored by the Golden Gate Boys Choir and Bellringers, its sole S.F. appearance will (tentatively) include selections from Vivaldi, Bach, Pergolese, Mozart, and Charpentier. The singing starts at 3:30 p.m. at St. Mary's Cathedral, Geary & Gough, S.F. Free; call (510) 887-4311.
Take That! In 1990, 16 gay British men were convicted of assault and given sentences of up to four-and-a-half years for privately engaging in consensual S/M. "The Spanner Case," as it has come to be known, has been appealed to the European Court of Human Rights, whose members helped decriminalize homosexuality in England in the 1960s. SpannerMart 2: S/M-Leather Flea Market and County Fair will raise funds for the appeal through activities ranging from auctions of leather goods to "rousing, on-the-spot flagellation." Music and refreshments will add to the festive atmosphere; all genders and orientations are welcome. The shop-'n'-flog lasts from 1 to 5 p.m. at the Women's Building, 3543 18th St, S.F. Tickets are $5; call 673-0452.
Mighty Moe Moe Tucker first made a name for herself as the Velvet Underground's tomboyish drummer; her ramshackle rhythmic style is a fundamental part of VU classics like "Waiting for My Man," and her singsong voice graces one of the group's more obscure treats, "I'm Sticking With You." For the past decade, Tucker has been alternating between two personalities: trailer-park mom and touring rocker. She brings the same no-nonsense charm to both: Amid the snide cooler-than-thou attitudes copped by hipsters in Jeff Feuerzeig's recent documentary on Half Japanese, Tucker's declarations of love for rock seemed especially refreshing. Hear her play at 8 p.m. at the Great American Music Hall, 859 O'Farrell, S.F. Tickets are $9; call 885-0750.
Odes to Carmen When Carmen McRae died last fall, it was another solemn reminder that an era of jazz divas that included Sarah Vaughan and Dinah Washington was coming to an end. An accomplished scatter also renowned for her subtle, intuitive phrasing, McRae lives on through recordings like Carmen Sings Monk and her influence on a younger generation of stylists. Backed by the Tom Garvin Trio, five vocalists -- Buddy Conner, Denise Perrier, Kitty Margolis, Madeline Eastman, and Mark Murphy -- pay tribute to the woman and the singer in "Carmen: Dedicated to You." A benefit for the Stanford Jazz Workshop Vocal Program's Carmen McRae Vocal Scholarship, the show starts at 8 p.m. at Kimball's East, 5555 Shellmound, Emeryville. Tickets are $15; call (510) 658-0606.
Krazy Karaoke Once a month, the thumpa-thumpa music stops and karaoke sneaks its way into the Stud. How? Through Singing for Suppers, a benefit for Project Open Hand, hosted by Pippy Lovestocking and Heklina. August's event includes star turns by Patsy Cline, Mint regular Elvis Herselvis, Robbie D., and you (if you've guts and/or blood alcohol level). The loony crooning begins at 9 p.m. at Ninth and Harrison, S.F. Admission is $1 (or a canned good); call 252-7883.
Lovely Libby "I love movies and sometimes I even love films," writes Libby Gelman-Waxner, "but above all, I always love watching what Kim Basinger will do with her hair so it will always get caught in her mouth." Libby is an assistant buyer in juniors activewear; she's also America's most beloved and irresponsible film critic. Collected in the book If You Ask Me, Libby's reviews for Premiere bypass silly stuff like dialogue and mise en scne, focusing on the things movie fans really care about: the ever-changing hair, clothes, and body parts of the stars. Libby on Streisand: "Barbra's only spontaneous moment in The Prince of Tides comes when Nick tosses her a football and she screams, 'My nails!' " On Michelle Pfeiffer: "I don't know whether to hate Michelle Pfeiffer or start a new religion or a chain of fitness centers built around her." On America: "In America, no one is ever really sorry, they just try and merchandise their apologies." Hear Libby and close friend Paul Rudnick at 7:30 p.m. at A Different Light Bookstore, 489 Castro, S.F. -- who knows, Nan Parks of the Bay Times may even attend. Free; call 431-0891.