We here at All Shook Down have previously made a big song and dance about how much we love Ke$ha. Seriously. We freakin' adore this woman, feathers, glitter, bad rhyming skills and all. And in the last couple of months our love has only grown stronger, thanks to the fact that she's been Tweeting about "lady-wang," running around telling people she once had sex with a ghost, writing a memoir at the age of 25, and confessing to Rolling Stone this month that all men getting on her tour bus (which she endearingly refers to as "the vagina jungle") have to "drop trou" so she can take a Polaroid of their junk. Also -- we're not too proud to admit it -- "Die Young" is stupid awesome.
So hearing that Iggy Pop was guesting on a Ke$ha song called "Dirty Love" sent our pulses racing and our hearts fluttering. This would be the most crazed, badass, rock 'n' roll party song of all time. This would be the thing that would soundtrack every drunken soiree for the rest of our lives. This would be a thing of bizarre, unhinged beauty.
Sadly -- and we should've seen this coming, honestly -- it turns out that if you put two crazy people in a room together, they just sound, well, completely fucking insane. The part right at the beginning where they introduce each other is a really good indication of what's to come later on. Check it out:
Now, in all fairness, despite sounding reasonably strained, Ke$ha does a pretty solid job on the first verse. She's clearly trying to put her heart and soul into this thing. And she sings really high notes without AutoTune! High five for effort, girl.
Then Iggy comes in and, well, shit just gets weird. Like, super weird: "Cockroaches do it in garbage cans," he growls, "Rug merchants do it in Afghanistan, Santorum did it in a V-neck sweater, pornos produce it, but wild child can do it better." Wait. Rug merchants? What?! Then, about 30 seconds later, Ke$ha says champagne tastes like piss. What the b'jesus are these two lunatics talking about?
To make matters worse, during that middle section where there's a
gospel choir and Ke$ha doing her white-girl rap thing (which we're
actually not opposed to), Iggy sounds completely out of place, like
a random dude who's wandered into the studio unannounced and just
decided to join in.
By the time we get to the third chorus, the real problem with "Dirty Love" becomes well and truly apparent. Ke$ha sounds like she's about to have an aneurism belting out something this rockin', and Iggy Pop sounds awkward as all hell trying to fit onto something so poppy. The twosome clearly tried to meet somewhere in between both of their styles -- which is admirable -- but failed to find a place either of them sounds truly comfortable in.
So, yes, it's not exactly what we wanted from a Ke$ha/Iggy Pop collaboration, and we are feeling rather disappointed. The only silver lining here is that we're pretty sure that once we get past the confused nature of "Dirty Love," and just how uncomfortable everyone involved sounds, we're probably going to start finding it hilarious. So maybe there's a party anthem for the ages lurking in here after all.