Monday, October 29, 2007

RaidersSuckNinersSuck Week 8: Bay Area Football - So Bad We’re Looking Forward to the Warriors

Posted By on Mon, Oct 29, 2007 at 10:58 AM

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Raiders at the Tennessee Titans

"Please God, remove me from this hell called Raiders football."

That was my first thought upon completion of a 13 – 9 Titans victory.

What was played today by your 2007 Raiders can only loosely be termed football, so I discarded that thought quickly.

The Raiders' ineptitude continued on nearly all fronts -- pass defense being the only exception. Seatwarmer Culpepper continued to spew bile all over the field, the offense stacked penalties like Legos, and the defense was scrotum-punched by the Titans running game at crucial moments, leaving the Raiders doubled over and nauseous by the end. For the second week in a row, field goals dominated the game, the most boring football yet this season.

It’s clear the Raiders need to make some changes, Culpepper has been horrible since his knee injury (and horrible before the injury). He is back-up material at best. They can be no worse off than now with JaMillions Russell.

Raiders Suckages:

1.Broken record time – Culpepper is playing like a bewildered sloth, slow to make decisions and generally wrong when he has time to make one.

2.Discipline – The Raiders set a season high for penalties today. Don’t ask me how many. I lost count at 11.

New Orleans Saints at the 49ers

A 31 – 10 molesting at the hands of the New Orleans Saints. My beloved Red and Gold have devolved from a strong ending last season and a 2 – 0 start, to their current state of complete suckitude. The team has slipped well past the drain and now resides among the fetid slime inside the plumbing.

The second blow-out in a row, the 49ers loss highlights an unmotivated defense suffering under the responsibility of playing with the worst offense in the NFL. Alex Smith, fresh off of his four-week injury rest for a separated shoulder, was beaten up and down the field like a white trash foster kid. He was inaccurate and off-balance all day, managing only one “pride touchdown” in the closing minutes of the game. My first thought after this game, "Please, God, let the basketball season begin."

49ers Suckages:

1. Holy Sucky Offense Batman! These guys really blow.

2. Coaching – When a ship is sinking this fast you have to look to the Captain.

Overall Supersuckers:

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49ers!! Come on, it was 31 – 10. Sure the Raiders sucked today, but at least for their sake the Titans sucked enough to keep the Raiders close.

-- By The Wook

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