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Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Theresa Sparks and Jane Kim, Sisters of Secrecy

Posted By on Wed, Sep 15, 2010 at 3:59 PM

click to enlarge Theresa Sparks and Jane Kim would rather not receive your birthday greetings, it would seem - PHOTO OF JANE KIM   |   LUKE THOMAS
  • Photo of Jane Kim | Luke Thomas
  • Theresa Sparks and Jane Kim would rather not receive your birthday greetings, it would seem
Photo of Jane Kim | Luke Thomas
Theresa Sparks and Jane Kim would rather not receive your birthday greetings, it would seem
We weren't the only ones to notice something a bit odd in the most recent edition of the Central City Extra. In a two-page spread, a dozen would-be successors to District 6 Supervisor Chris Daly grin for the camera, express their political bona fides, and reveal a little back-of-the-baseball card information. Nearly all of the candidates are wearing clothes.

Yet while even aforementioned nudist candidate George Davis sees fit to reveal his birthdate, frontrunning candidates Theresa Sparks and Jane Kim were the only two who did not. The Chronicle's Leah Garchik commented on this last week -- but didn't come away with either candidates' birthdays. Well, for what it's worth, we did.

Sparks told SF Weekly her birthday is April 8, 1949 -- "I was born in the first half of the 20th century," she admits. While Sparks -- a transgender former executive who ran a sex toy company before getting involved in San Francisco politics -- is open about her unconventional past, she's reticent to give her age. Simply put, Sparks hates the newspaper convention of listing someone's age between commas after their name. Well, okay then.

More confusing is Kim's rationale for declining to state her age. As candidates go, she is on the younger side, as anyone getting a glimpse at the photogenic School Board president would gather. But she's older than Sean Elsbernd, Gavin Newsom, Chris Daly, or Carmen Chu when they were first sworn in as supervisors. Yes, Kim is young -- but it's only the most highly diplomatic bouncer or liquor store clerk who'll be asking her for her ID.

click to enlarge We promise not to black out and make a scene at your birthdays...
  • We promise not to black out and make a scene at your birthdays...
We promise not to black out and make a scene at your birthdays...
Her campaign manager, Enrique Pearce, would only guess Kim "doesn't want to be overwhelmed with birthday cards." Cute -- but since she and all the other candidates list their home addresses for Central City Extra, a devoted admirer could, say, send her an unbirthday card every day of the year, and be right 364 times. Kim, for her part, did not return our persistent calls.

Well, we have plenty of experience not getting our calls returned by photogenic women Kim's age -- but, this time, it's not a problem. Going by Kim's information from the Voter Registration Database, she was born on July 9, 1977, and is 33. Sparks' b-day of April 8, 1949 checks out on the database as well.

There -- was that so painful?

Incidentally, not only is George Davis the only D-6 candidate not wearing a shirt in his photo, he's also the oldest. Davis was wearing his birthday suit on Sept. 17, 1946. And today, too.

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About The Author

Joe Eskenazi

Joe Eskenazi

Bio:
Joe Eskenazi was born in San Francisco, raised in the Bay Area, and attended U.C. Berkeley. He never left. "Your humble narrator" is a staff writer and columnist for SF Weekly, which he has written for since 2007. He resides in the Excelsior with his wife, 4.3 miles from his birthplace and 5,474 from hers... more

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