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Friday, April 22, 2011

World's Worst Junior High Cheater Busted (PIC)

Posted By on Fri, Apr 22, 2011 at 2:31 PM

click to enlarge A regular Einstein... - COGDOG
  • CogDog
  • A regular Einstein...

If you're bad at school and worse at cheating, you're in a bind. As Dirty Harry opined, "A man's got to know his limitations." The seventh-grader in question did not.

Your humble narrator has unearthed the odd document or two, but never one as hilarious as this. You can see it below -- but it requires an explanation.

A colleague who teaches junior high flunked said student -- which required him to take his report card home, display it to a parent, and return with a signature. We can vouch, with 100 percent certainty, that the paper below is what the student saw fit to hand back to his teacher.

click to enlarge Just you wait until 'Dad' gets home...
  • Just you wait until 'Dad' gets home...

Unsurprisingly, this masterful attempt at forgery did not pass muster. When asked whether he did not know his mother's first name, the student said he did -- but was not capable of signing it in script. He was made to phone his mother, reveal his wrongdoing, and apologize.

The original of this document is now framed on a wall of the teacher's home.

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About The Author

Joe Eskenazi

Joe Eskenazi

Joe Eskenazi was born in San Francisco, raised in the Bay Area, and attended U.C. Berkeley. He never left. "Your humble narrator" was a staff writer and columnist for SF Weekly from 2007 to 2015. He resides in the Excelsior with his wife, 4.3 miles from his birthplace and 5,474 from hers.


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