Faygo: From Insane Choirs to Insane Clowns

As a snobby California native, I am grateful that I did not grow up with Faygo, especially if it would have meant suffering through this commercial — a species of straight-faced, irony-free advertising which is long since extinct. Good riddance to it, says I.

Sidenote: no disrespect intended to Faygo or those who love it. Peace!

The commercial is oppressive whimsy (cf. the commentary track for S10E08 of The Simpsons) on a borderline fascistic level. Pardon my Godwinning, but seriously, what do you think happens to people who refuse to sway and sing as the red-striped man makes his rounds? That boat's returning to port a few souls lighter. And maybe it's just me, but I hated Sunday nights, since I had to go back to school the next day. Thank goodness I had rubber bands to console me.

By the way, the minute-long Faygo Boat Commercial is available on DVD for a mere $9.95. Please do not send cash.

Faygo's new (and reluctant) claim to fame is as the official beverage of the Insane Clown Posse. Well, newish, as the group's Faygo fetish dates back to 1993. If that seems like a long time ago, consider that the group formed in 1989. What have you been doing for twenty-two years?

They drink copious amounts, spray the audience with it and throw bottles into the crowd, which has resulted in at least one lawsuit.

Their annual festival, The Gathering of the Jugglaos, also features — oh, you knew this was coming — a Faygo Wet T-Shirt Contest (link NSFW).


Does anyone else feel … dirty right now? In a bad way?

Maybe singing will help! Altogether now: “Comic books and rubber bands, climb into the tree top … “

Nope. That didn't help at all.

Sherilyn Connelly is a San Francisco-based writer. She also curates and hosts Bad Movie Night at The Dark Room, every Sunday at 8pm.

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