Let's face it, San Francisco: We wish we had lost the Revolutionary War.
Hurray, we have the Tea Party! Wouldn't you really rather be in the EU? Then, when Oklahoma and Kansas and Alabama get together to elect President Bachmann, we could all move to the Languedoc or the Algarve or even Lithuania — anywhere, really — without needing a visa.
So while everybody else is out celebrating Independence Day — a typically crappy non-British movie; did Will Smith really deal with an alien invasion using only his fists? — a certain cranky crowd will seek refuge in the cool, musty, environs of a pub that serves room-temperature beer and knows what bubble and squeak is.
Here are the five best places to regret George Washington's leadership.