Tuesday Five: Pliny the Younger Emerges Feb. 5

Plus details on The Lark and The Perennial, Flint's lead-contaminated water leads to an emergency, and a little incident involving David Bowie and Olive Garden (kinda).

[jump] No Pliny the Younger For Beer Week
The highly prized Russian River Brewing IPA that visits us every year like a faithful comet will not align with Beer Week. Pliny the Younger's 2016 window of availability is Feb. 5-18, and because Beer Week got moved around so as not to compete with the Super Bowl, the 10.25 percent ABV, tripled-hopped brew is going to materialize two weeks later. Since it's neither bottled nor available in growlers, you'll probably have to drive up to Santa Rosa to get some, or else know someone who knows which elite bars will tap a keg.

FutureBars Opens The Lark
Not to be confused with Lark (in the Castro), or the recently closed Lark Creek Steak, (part of the Lark Creek Restaurant Group), or — considerably less likely — Larkin Street Youth Services' Lark-Inn, FutureBars has opened its latest destination, The Lark. Located next to Cask, FutureBars' upscale wine and liquor shop, in what was once the dive Dave's Bar, it's got a near-invisible online presence apart from an Instagram photo, a barebones Hoodline story, and a single Yelp review that notes it's still a dive. (Even FutureBars' own site doesn't acknowledge it yet.) But it's open!
The Perennial Opens in Mid-Market Tomorrow
Anthony Myint (Mission Chinese Food), his wife Karen Leibowitz, and Chris Kiyuna (Mission Bowling Club) will throw open the doors of their new restaurant, The Perennial, tomorrow night in Mid-Market. You'll find beef and blistered broccoli leaves, celeriac gnocchi, cauliflower toast, and Kumamato oysters, all assembled within the smallest environmental footprint possible, down to forgoing a traditional ice machine. According to Inside Scoop's Jonathan Kauffman, beverage director Jennifer Colliau's cocktail list is divided into four categories: “Highballs,” “Lowballs,” “Fun,” and “Complicated.” Who says complicated can't be fun?
The Perennial, 59 Ninth St., 415-500-7788 or theperennialsf.com

Flint Water Crisis Continues in Sadly Predictable Way
According to Salon, Pres. Obama has declared a state of emergency in and around Flint, Mich., and the National Guard is handing out bottled water (supplemented slightly by donations from none other than Cher). This all happened because the city pumped cheap water from the Flint River, in spite of its corrosive chemical signature's ability to leach lead from aging household pipes, and declined to add an anti-corrosive agent. In other words, a state-appointed emergency manager city opted to save money by poisoning the largely African-American residents of the impoverished city. The Democratic presidential candidates are calling for action, while the Republicans are basically pretending it's not a crisis.

Your Editor is a Joyless Pedant

This morning, Significant Digits, FiveThirtyEight.com's daily roundup of hard news tidbits and amusing trivia referred derisively to the “David Bowie constellation,” comparing the apparently wide-open ability of anyone with a telescope to go about creating new constellations willy-nilly to the atmosphere at Olive Garden. I read FiveThirtyEight daily and it's usually top-notch, but talking shit about people who are creatively mourning my idol crossed a line. So I had to correct the record: Olive Garden doesn't advertise itself as having “no rules.” That's Outback Steakhouse, motherfucker!

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