Metallica To Record Pop Album Called Master of Puppies

Front man James Hetfield says he's a "changed man" now that he has a dog.

For more than three decades, Metallica has churned out rock-solid, soul-crushing heavy-metal jams filled with furious guitar riffs, throaty vocals, and wicked-fast drumming. But now that’s about to change, because frontman James Hetfield says he wants to “try something new” and release a pop album.

“I’ve always wanted to tap into my inner Taylor Swift,” says Hetfield, who will title the album Master of Puppies. “I want to soften things up. You know, sing a few love ballads and scorching yet catchy break-up songs.”

The decision to record an all-pop album was inspired by a shih tzu named Sprinkle that Hetfield adopted from the San Francisco rescue organization Muttville.  Though he had originally planned to get a pit bull, drummer Lars Ulrich, who was with him at the adoption center, said that Hetfield “flipped a shit” when he saw the tiny fur ball.

Meet Sprinkle, James Hetfield’s new BFF.

“All of a sudden, I heard Hetfield emit a shriek that was higher than any note I’ve ever heard him produce,” Ulrich says. “He squatted down in front of her cage and started talking to her in this weird baby voice. It was very uncomfortable.”

Now, after four months of living with Sprinkle, Hetfield — who purportedly kicked former guitarist Dave Mustaine’s dog in 2009 — is a changed man. Not only did Hetfield have a custom staircase built for his bed so that Sprinkle could climb up it, but his band mates have reported seeing him pushing around a baby stroller with the pooch inside.

“I never thought I’d see this day,” Ulrich says. “But love is love, and it does strange things to people.”

Master of Puppies is slated to come out “sometime this summer,” Hetfield says, and will include an amalgam of upbeat, dance-inducing ditties about K-9s, the special bonds between man and dog, and of course, Sprinkle herself.

It’s not as though Metallica is the first band to embark upon an animal-themed concept album. Run The Jewels dropped the remix album Meow The Jewels in 2015, and Mac DeMarco recently released a music video for the track “This Old Dog,” which he filmed at a dog-grooming parlor.

Because of this, Hetfield says he plans to take Master of Puppies to a whole other level.

“I’m going to get actual dogs to bark to the beat of each song,” he says. “And Sprinkle is going to take the lead on a few tracks. She’s got a wonderful howl and sometimes when she whines, it sounds like she’s saying, ‘Dadda.’ “

Happy April Fool’s Day!


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