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Fair-Wage Zombies and Social-Justice Witches Descend on City Hall

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Maybe you thought City Hall was full of ghouls and demigorgons already, but today, it’s about to be more so. Today, at noon, zombies will invade the dome clamoring for a fair wage. District 8 Supervisor Jeff Sheehy, SEIU 1021 will lead an undead horde of low-wage workers — home-care aids, non-profit employees, and airport personnel, all dressed in zombie costumes — to the steps of City Hall and into the supervisors’ offices demanding the Board enact a Minimum Compensation Ordinance (MCO) to benefit hundreds of San Franciscans who are underpaid.
Bride and Groom Zombies will take the lead, with at least 60 workers in tow. Under current city law, service contracts with the city mandate a minimum hourly wage of $13.64, even though S.F.’s minimum wage is now $14. The MCO would nudge the wage floor higher, first by $1.86 (to $15.50 in total) and then by an additional dollar in 2018. Remember, $16.50 might sound like a high minimum wage at first, but at 40 hours per week and 50 weeks per year, it’s only $33,000 a year. That’s hardly enough to live on, let alone eat organic, sustainably harvested, biodynamically grown braaaaaaaains.
Then, at 4 p.m., witches will take over Civic Center Plaza opposite City Hall for Hex for the Future: A Halloween Romp, an occult protest intended to “open the gates to a just future and a broad, deep, liberated political imagination.”
Imagining a world with universal housing and social justice instead of prisons and jails, activists and benevolent witches Keith Hennessy and Annie Danger — managed by Circo Zero, and with support from the SF Arts Commission and California Arts Council — will lead a group of people wearing all-black into City Hall and marshal the forces of the spirit world. (Witch hats will be provided, but potential attendees should RSVP, because it’s going to be documented.) No brooms, please, as security could misconstrue them as weapons.

In other news, the ghost of former Supervisor Dan White was seen stalking the North Light Court while eating a Twinkie and mumbling to itself. It doesn’t even have a permit. What a dick, even in the netherworld.

Zombie Invasion for a Minimum Compensation Ordinance, Tuesday, Oct. 31, noon, City Hall’s Polk St. steps. Free.
Hex for the Future, Tuesday, Oct. 31, 4-6 p.m., at Civic Center Plaza. Free; circozero.org.
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Peter Lawrence Kane

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