Last week, Board of Supervisors President David Chiu announced he's running for mayor. What is his platform?

• His record. He promises to betray his supporters after this election, too

• To keep Willie Brown close and Rose Pak closer

• A pledge to be 33 percent more Asian

• To leave no deal uncut

• Diversity: He'll be the first Harvard graduate to ever hold a position of power and influence

• A solemn promise to give Eric Mar something to do

• He'll bring civility back to all the people who don't trust him

• To parlay “mayor” into an even bigger, more prestigious gig. Like maybe lieutenant governor