Police: 'Device' Detonated Near Kezar Stadium Wednesday Was Just Duffel Bag Full of Clothes

The “device” that exploded last night at the intersection of Waller Street and Kezar Drive loudly enough to be heard a mile off was just a gym bag full of old clothes pre-emptively destroyed by the SFPD.

Police spokeswoman Sgt. Lyn Tomioka told SF Weekly that police at Park Station were informed that a suspicious package was sitting in their driveway. In police jargon, the “EOD crew” (explosive ordinance disposal — the bomb squad) was called and it “rendered the package safe” (that is, blew it up).

After the duffel bag was immolated, it became apparent that it was just somebody's old clothing. Witnesses told police that someone had been throwing packages out of a vehicle seen leaving the area — but Tomioka said this is proceeding as a “noncriminal investigation” (that is, someone was just tossing crap out the window, not attempting to spook the police with a faux-bomb).

Remember, when throwing shit out of your car is criminalized, only criminals will throw shit out of their cars.

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